Jim Gaffigan: Cinco

America’s king of clean comedy delivers wickedly funny jokes in his fifth hour-long special Cinco. Though he’s mostly concerned about what he’ll eat after the show, Jim Gaffigan finds time to joke about kids, phones, trucks and, of course, food.

Aah! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Aw, thank you. Lower your expectations. Thank you. Thank you. It would have been weird if you didn’t clap, I guess. If I walked out and you’re like, “Mm. Well, let’s see. Let’s see how fat this bastard got.” And the answer is, “Fatter.” I gave up a long time ago. Now it’s like it’s happening to someone else. “Oh, someone should do something. I feel like I’m witnessing a forest fire. I hope they can contain it. Change the channel.” This is real. This isn’t a prosthetic. I did it myself. It’s organic. I am a fat guy.

Jim Gaffigan